


Instinct

by MamaBearCat



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Influenza, Pneumonia, Protective InuYasha (InuYasha), Sick Character, Sickfic, sick Kagome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:42:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25144111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MamaBearCat/pseuds/MamaBearCat
Summary: “Here, why don’t you wear this”, said Inuyasha, shrugging off his suikan. The coughing was concerning, and the scent of remembered illness was stronger than before. He tried not to think of his mother. That was a different time, and a different place. Kagome was sure she just had a cold.But his instincts were screaming at him, that this was serious, that she was in a life threatening situation, and that he needed to act to protect, to care, to save her. He lifted up his jacket and held it open so that she could slide her arms through the sleeves, then belted the obi and helped her snuggle back down into the sleeping bag, his worried gaze locked on her sleepy eyes.“Hey”, she said. There was a slight smile on her face, despite her flushed and feverish cheeks. “It’s just a cold! It’s not like I’m dying, silly.”“Keh.”✨Nominated for BEST CANON FICTION: Feudal Connection Awards, 2020, 4th Quarter✨🌸WINNER of BEST CANON FICTION: Feudal Connection Awards, 2020, 4th Quarter🌸
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha
Comments: 169
Kudos: 384
Collections: Quarter 4 2020 Inuyasha Fandom Award Winners





	1. Just a Cold

_Achoo!_

Inuyasha opened his eyes. He hadn’t been asleep, just thinking, but the slight noise of Kagome’s sneeze had startled him. When she sneezed again and again, even though she was sitting by the warmth of the fire, he felt a little concerned. Humans could be so fragile sometimes, and the longer he spent with Kagome, Sango and Miroku on their dangerous quest only proved that. He shrugged off his suikan and draped it around the girl’s shoulders.

“Here, put this on so you won’t catch a cold.” She glanced up at him with a smile, her fingers stroking the soft surface of the red tanned pelt of the fire rat that made up his suikan.

“Thanks”, she said softly, then continued to sneeze some more, unable to stop them coming.

He squatted down next to her near the fire, and bumped her with his shoulder.

“Eh. Too late, you’ve already caught one.” Kagome giggled.

“No, someone’s just probably gossiping about me”, she said with a grin, but then couldn’t hold back yet another sneeze.

Grumbling under his breath, Inuyasha held his hand to her forehead. It felt a little warm, but perhaps that could be from the fire? And then he realised he’d laid his hands on her without asking. Trying to cover his sudden embarrassment with bluster, he huffed in an exasperated way.

“Don’t be ridiculous, who’d ever gossip about you?” He moved his hand away quickly and placed it against his own forehead. They felt almost the same. “Hmm that’s good, you don’t have a fever.” But was his body temperature the same as hers? He never felt the cold like she did as a hanyou, although he did feel the cold a little more on his human nights. Perhaps his usual body temperature was higher than a humans? Maybe she did have a fever?

Kagome leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder, and he froze.

“Uh… Kagome?” She smiled sweetly, nuzzling her cheek against him. 

“Thanks Inuyasha, thanks for looking after me.”

“Uh, you’re startin’ ta get warm”, he said, heat rising in his own flustered cheeks. Or maybe that was just him. Did she know what she was doing, with the nuzzling thing? The back of his suikan was already covered in her scent from where he’d carried her earlier in the day, and now here she was, rubbing her cheek against him. Her sweet scent, overlayed by the smell of soap from her time drifted up to him, and he couldn’t help but close his eyes and inhale deeply. _Fuck, Kagome_.

She always took him by surprise when she did this. Not being afraid to get close to him. It wasn’t that he disliked it, quite the opposite. It was just… what was he supposed to do? Where was he supposed to put his hands? Would she _like_ him to put his hands somewhere? He’d never been taught what to do with a girl he liked or how to show it, and there was no way he would take any cues from that pervert Miroku. _His_ hands only got him into trouble!

“It’s okay, don’t worry”, she yawned.

_Fuck, was she reading his thoughts now?!_ Then he realised with a rush of relief she was still talking about the fever thing, not his inability to show his feelings.

“Keh. You sound tired. You better lay down and get some sleep Kagome. We got a lotta walkin’ to do tomorrow.”

“I know, but…” she squirmed a little, and he heard her heartbeat get a little faster, “could I stay here next to you a bit longer? If that’s okay?” She shivered a little, and before he could put any thought into it at all, his arm went around her, pulling her against him. He tucked the fire rat around her shoulders more snugly, pulling the edges together.

“If you wanna. No big deal.” He cleared his throat self consciously, very glad that she couldn’t hear that his own heart had increased its pace to match with hers.

He sat there with her in front of the dying fire, his arm around her until her heart slowed to a resting pace, and her soft regular breathing told him she was deeply asleep. Picking her up carefully, he carried her over to her sleeping bag, but then realised he had no way to push her into the warm cocoon without waking her up. Instead he placed her on top of it and tucked his fire rat around her snugly. Hopefully that would be warm enough. She was safe and asleep, wrapped in his clothing and in his scent, and his heart swelled. He couldn’t help his soft smile at her cuteness when she rubbed her cheek against the furred texture in her sleep.

Inuyasha moved back over to his position leaning back against a tree, resting Tessaiga over his shoulder. A slight movement where the others were sleeping caught his attention, and he glanced over. Miroku had one eye open and a smirk on his face.

“Very smooth my friend, very smooth indeed”, he whispered faintly, so only Inuyasha would be able to hear it.

Inuyasha’s slight rumbling growl and raised fist had Miroku slamming his eye closed and feigning sleep quickly. Inuyasha snorted, and closed his own eyes. Wouldn’t hurt to sleep for an hour or two himself. Who knew what the new day might bring?

* * *

The next morning dawned bright and sunny, and Kagome arose a little later than usual, blinking blearily at Sango’s cheery good morning as she made the tea for breakfast. As soon as she was upright, Kagome scrabbled in her bag for a tissue, then loudly blew her nose.

She threw the used tissue into the fire, still sniffing a little.

“Are you okay Kagome?” asked Shippou.

“Yeah, I’m fine”, she said reassuringly. “Just a little cold I think, nothing to worry about.”

When they were all packed and ready to go, Inuyasha surprised her by grabbing her heavy backpack off the ground and shrugging onto his own shoulder, walking off without a word. Kagome smiled, watching him fondly as he walked away, grumbling at some teasing remark made by Miroku and taking a swing at him, which the monk evaded deftly. Inuyasha could be so thoughtful sometimes. She had learned not to draw attention to him when he did little things for her like this. When she did, it usually ended badly, with him puffing himself up and reflexively spouting barbed words that she knew he probably didn’t mean, but that were hurtful, nonetheless.

She followed along close behind him, waiting until Miroku had finished their conversation and moved away. Seizing the opportunity, she stroked Inuyasha’s arm surreptitiously in a gesture of thanks as she walked past, ignoring the quiet ‘feh’ of feigned irritation.

By lunchtime, Kagome had used up her whole supply of tissues, the edges of her nose felt raw and chapped, and she was forced to just sniff, which she hated. She knew from experience that there was nothing more irritating than being in a classroom with one person who was continually sniffing, and she worried about annoying the others, especially Inuyasha, who’s patience with others physical shortcomings was not a strong point. Maybe next time she restocked her first aid kit she should add some cold and flu medication; one that would dry up a sniffle without making her drowsy, but that wasn’t particularly helpful right now. All she had were simple over the counter pain killers. She rubbed her eyes, hating the sinus headache that was building behind them. This sucked.

Inuyasha kept an eye on Kagome as they walked along the dirt road after their lunchtime stop. She was getting slower and slower, despite him carrying her backpack for her, and was lagging behind the group. Even Shippou had moved to Miroku’s shoulder instead of his usual spot on Kagome’s when her responses to his constant stream of questions had slowed, and her violent sneezes had dislodged him from his perch one too many times.

“You okay wench?” he asked, stopping to wait until she caught up and then slowing down his pace to walk beside her.

“Yeah”, she sniffed, her voice sounding nasal and stuffy. “Just a cold and a headache – I’ll take something for it when we stop tonight.”

Inuyasha sniffed the air. “There’s a hot spring not too far away – we could stop a bit earlier. Soaking in that and breathing in the steam might help with your cold.” Her eyes brightened a little.

“Thank you Inuyasha, that’s very thoughtful.”

“It’s nothin’ – we were goin’ that way anyway”, he said, his eyes flitting away from hers, suddenly very interested in the treeline up ahead. Kagome coughed suddenly, then grimaced.

“Ouch.”

“Sore throat too huh?”

She nodded. “I should probably make sure I stay away from Miroku and Sango”, she sniffed. “I don’t want them to catch this. Oh wait, I should probably stay away from you too!”

He shook his head. “Nah, I don’t seem to catch human illnesses.”

“You don’t?”

Inuyasha shrugged nonchalantly. “Yeah – it’s actually rare for me to catch demon stuff too.”

“Wow, that’s really interesting!” Kagome pondered, her expression brightening slightly as she remembered a concept from a recent biology lesson. “I wonder if it’s a hybrid vigour thing?”

“A what?!”

Kagome’s face flushed, realising that perhaps that wasn’t the most tactful thing to have said. “Uh, sorry, I was just thinking out loud, don’t worry about it.”

But when Inuyasha continued to stare at her with one eyebrow raised, she explained, trying to choose her words very carefully. “It’s something I learned about in biology in school, that’s the study of living things. There’s a technical term for it, but I can’t quite remember it at the moment. Basically, it means that sometimes an organism that comes from two very different uh, parents, will inherit and combine the strengths of both of them. And that also means immunity to illnesses too.”

“What’s an organism?”

“An individual animal, plant, or single-celled life form”, she recited in a sing song voice.

“So not people?”

“People are animals too Inuyasha”, she grinned, sniffing again. “We just like to think we’re better, but really, the only difference is that we think more about stuff, rather than relying on instincts alone.”

He glanced at her, then away again. “So instincts… they’re a bad thing?”

“Not at all. Humans have them too, we just don’t listen to them very well. I guess we’ve forgotten how to. I really admire they way we can rely on yours Inuyasha – where would we be without your sense of hearing and smell, and the way you can sense danger? I can’t count the number of times you’ve had a bad feeling about something and it’s turned out to be true.”

“Keh”, he grunted, glancing away from her again in an effort to hide the rising colour in his cheeks, even as his shoulders squared with pride. “What about demons… and half-demons. Are we one of your organisms too?”

She nodded, pleased that he’d caught on so quickly. “Yes, we’re all organisms – you, me, Shippou, Miroku, Sesshomaru...”

Inuyasha snorted. “Don’t let him hear you puttin’ him on the same level as the rest of us wench, he’s liable to have a hissy fit.”

Kagome giggled, until another coughing fit hit her, making her slow to a stop. “That one hurt”, she whimpered.

“Then stop talkin’ so much dummy! Rest your throat.”

Inuyasha handed her the water bottle from the outside pocket of her backpack, and she gratefully took a long drink. He handed the backpack to her then crouched down in front of her. “C’mon slowpoke, climb on, or we’ll never get there.” Kagome swatted him lightly on the shoulder for the teasing, but climbed on, grateful to stop walking for a while. Her head was beginning to thump, her eyes were hurting, and her throat felt raw. Most colds she’d had only lasted a few days, so she hoped she’d be able to sleep the majority of this one off overnight and feel better in the morning. Maybe Inuyasha was right. Maybe a dip in the hot spring and a good nights sleep would make all the difference.

* * *

A good nights sleep seemed to make things only worse, even with the relaxing soak in the spring. Even though Kagome insisted she was fine, and that it was just a cold, Inuyasha was beginning to worry. It was quite a warm Spring morning, the sun having a little more bite to it than the previous week, but Kagome had complained about the cold. She was keeping her distance from Miroku and Sango now, worried about them catching her cold, which was proving to be stubborn. Her hands had wrapped tightly around her metal mug filled with hot tea as they ate breakfast, the occasional shiver causing her to slop the hot liquid on the ground. He’d wordlessly offered her his back again, and she’d clambered on less gracefully than usual. She was still shivering, despite the warmth of the sunshine and his shared body heat.

“Kagome, you got anythin’ for fevers in that bag a yours?” he asked.

“Already taken some”, she whispered raspily, then turning her head to one side to cough. “Ugh, sorry.”

“It’s alright, you can’t help it. Just try not to put snot in my hair, wench”, he teased, and then frowned when the comment didn’t even get a small rise out of her. Her scent was beginning to remind him of something that he didn’t want to remember, and even though he wasn’t the praying type, he sent a silent wish up into the ether.-

Kagome snoozed on and off on his back all day, blinking blearily at everyone when they stopped to take breaks. When they finally set up camp for the evening, everyone bustled around Kagome, who sat listlessly on a fallen log that Inuyasha had rolled over closer to the fire for her, her unzipped sleeping bag clutched around her like a cloak. She’d stopped sniffing finally, but that seemed to have been replaced with a horrible barking cough that shook her small frame and left her gasping for air.

Inuyasha paused behind her, listening intently. There was a slight rattle to her breathing that he didn’t like. A wheeze when she breathed out, and a crackle when she breathed in. More memories of his mother’s sick room crowded in, the stench of medicine jars and the liniment rubbed on her back, the multiple quilts she had shivered under, the wheeze of her breath as her lungs slowly filled.

Kagome coughed again, then got up shakily, clutching her sleeping bag around her in an attempt to keep her shivers at bay. She spat out a mouthful of phlegm behind a nearby tree, then sat down at the fire again.

“Sango”, she said raspily, watching as the woman served out helpings of rice and miso broth, “I’m not real hungry. I think I might try and get an early night’s sleep. I’m sure I’ll feel better in the morning.”

“Of course Kagome-chan”, said Sango in a motherly way. “That sounds like a very good plan.”

She finished serving out the portions of food, and they all sat down on a log on the opposite side of the fire, watching as Kagome slid herself into her sleeping bag and closed her eyes. Kirara watched the girl shiver inside her sleeping bag for a few moments, then padded across to the other side of the fire, transforming into her larger form and snuggling up beside her.

“Maybe we should have a rest day tomorrow”, said Sango quietly to Inuyasha. “There’s a stream nearby with plenty of fish, and it’s a fairly defensible position, should anything try to attack us.”

Inuyasha grunted non- commitally, his eyes locked on Kagome. Miroku nudged his arm.

“You seem worried Inuyasha. Do you suspect it’s more than just a cold? She does seem very feverish.”

Shippou jumped up onto Sango’s lap, his big green eyes concerned. “Kagome said it was just a cold. She wouldn’t lie about that would she?” Sango stroked the kit’s fluffy fringe, smiling gently.

“I’m sure Kagome will be fine. We are just worried about her because we care, that’s all, and it’s hard to see her looking not well when she’s usually so cheerful.”

Shippou sidled a little closer to Inuyasha, and tugged on his sleeve. Inuyasha looked down at him in surprise. The kit’s green eyes were firmly locked on Kagome and Kirara, his expression serious.

“My mama died of a lung fever. Hers started just like this.”

Inuyasha’s hand ruffled Shippou’s fluffly fringe, and to Shippou’s surprise, he picked him up gently and placed him onto his shoulder.

“Yeah runt. Mine too.”

* * *

It was the violent coughing that woke him in the darkness. And the chattering of Kagome’s teeth.

He moved quickly over to her side, and she blinked blearily at him, shivering inside her sleeping bag. Kirara had moved back over to Sango’s side, sleeping in her smaller form, and the loss of body heat must have chilled her.

““I’m sorry. Did I wake you up?”, she whispered, then coughed again, curling herself up tightly in a ball in her sleeping bag. Her voice was raspy, and Inuyasha’s ears flattened at the timbre of her voice, she hardly sounded like herself at all.

“Nah”, he fibbed, “don’t need as much sleep as you.” He moved his hand over to her forehead again. ‘Damn, you definitely have a fever.”

“I feel cold”, she whispered. Another coughing fit began, which she tried to smother. He watched as she reached out her arm to her back pack, grabbing two small ovular pills and swallowing them with a sip of water. She tucked her arm back in the sleeping bag, teeth chattering loudly.

“Here, why don’t you wear this”, said Inuyasha, shrugging off his suikan. The coughing was concerning, and the scent of remembered illness was stronger than before. He tried not to think of his mother. That was a different time, and a different place. Kagome was sure she just had a cold.

But his instincts were screaming at him, that this was serious, that she was in a life threatening situation, and that he needed to act to protect, to care, to save her. He lifted up his jacket and held it open so that she could slide her arms through the sleeves, then belted the obi and helped her snuggle back down into the sleeping bag, his worried gaze locked on her sleepy eyes.

“Hey”, she said. There was a slight smile on her face, despite her flushed and feverish cheeks. “It’s just a cold! It’s not like I’m dying, silly.”

“Keh.”

He moved back over to his position at the base of the tree, watching as she drifted back to sleep. But as soon as he was certain she wouldn’t wake, he moved back to sit beside her. Kagome continued to cough while she slept, sometimes waking herself up with a coughing fit, but would then settle down again to toss and turn restlessly.

Shippou joined Inuyasha next to Kagome not long before dawn.

“She smells sick. Like really sick”, he whispered. Inuyasha grunted.

“You aren’t gonna make her look for shards today are you? That would be mean.”

“Whaddya take me for runt – a slave driver?” he snorted. “I’m gonna take her back through the well to her mother’s house – they’ve got medicines there that can probably fix this in a day. But she’s gonna pitch a fit about it, so you gotta back me up, right?”

Shippou nodded seriously. “She’s gonna be okay, isn’t she Inuyasha?”

He snorted again. “She’s Kagome. She’s stubborn enough to tell any sickness to piss off because she’s got things to do.”

But by the time Sango and Miroku woke a few hours later, Kagome was still coughing and wheezing, looking even more feverish, and Shippou had worked himself up into anxious tears. Inuyasha was doing his best to calm the kit down while still keeping his senses trained on Kagome. When Sango approached to check on Kagome, he thrust Shippou into Sango’s arms.

“Here, take him for a minute.”

She cuddled the sniffing kit against her closely. “What’s wrong?”

Shippou rubbed his little face into Sango’s chest. “Kagome’s sick like my Mama!”

“Hey runt, we don’t know that. It might not be that bad, alright?” said Inuyasha, his eyes never leaving Kagome. “I’m gonna take her throught the well, and her Mama will make a fuss of her and give her medicine and then she’ll be fine.”

When Kagome started to push herself up, he was there to rub her back when she began coughing again.

“What’s going on?” asked Kagome croakily.

“You’re sick.” Kagome glared at him.

“And?”

“And I’m takin’ you back through the well to your mother.”

“Inuyasha, it’s just a cold!” Kagome spluttered. “I’m perfectly capable!”

“Sure, wench, sure”, he said, grumbling as she coughed again. “You can get back to being perfectly capable _after_ I’ve taken you home to rest.”

“But we’re too far away!” she spluttered, teeth chattering again now that she was sitting up out of her sleeping bag. “It would take us days to get back!”

“Tch! Normally I can’t get the idea of you goin’ home outta your head, and now you wanna stay here? It don’t matter how far away we are, I can move fast when I need to.” He bobbed down so he was squatting right in front of her, his amber eyes serious. “And that’s what we’re gonna do, so just get used to the idea.”

“Inuyasha, this is ridiculous!” Kagome huffed raspily. “Yes, I do feel not very well at the moment, but it’s nothing serious! It’s just a fever and a cough!”

Grumbling, he wrapped the fire rat around her tighter, rubbing her back again as another bout of coughing racked her small form. “Dammit Kagome, stop bein’ so stubborn! Just… even if it’s nothin’, it’s not like you’re gonna be able to fight anything while you’re this sick!”

She leaned against him wearily, all the physical fight gone out of her after her coughing fit, but still glowering at him. “Way to hit a girl when she’s down!” She sighed. “Okay Inuyasha, you win…but only because I don’t feel well enough to deal with your attitude at the moment.”

“Feh, more like common sense.”

“Why are you over reacting like this?” she wheezed. “People in my time get sick like this, and they take some medicine and continue working as usual.”

Inuyasha could hear the low pitched crackling sound her lungs made as she breathed, even more audible than before. His sleepless night filled with worry made him sharper than he meant to be.

“But this _ain’t_ your time wench! People die from lung fever okay? Whole families. Whole villages wiped out. And I’m not gonna sit here listening to your lungs fill up when I can do something about it!”

Kagome’s eyes widened, her fingers clutched the sleeping bag. “Influenza pandemic”, she whispered.

“What?”

“There was an influenza pandemic during the Sengoku Jidai. It started in Asia and followed the trade routes to Europe, even Africa and the Americas. No one knows how many people died.”

Shippou jumped down from Sango’s arms, and buried himself in the folds of the sleeping bag filling Kagome’s lap. “Please Kagome, let Inuyasha take you back. You smell sick.”

Kagome shook her head, her hands hovering over his small form as if she longed to pick him up, but didn’t dare. “Please, go back to Sango Shippou. I couldn’t bear it if you got sick too. And I can’t go through the well. I’ve made up my mind.”

“Sorry wench, you don’t have a say in this, I’m takin’ you home.”

“I _can’t!_ ”, she pleaded. “What if this is a strain of influenza that hasn’t been seen in my time before? What if Mama and Grandpa and Souta got it? Souta’s still young, and Grandpa is old, if this is influenza, it might kill them! What if someone visiting the shrine got it somehow, and it spread through Tokyo? Millions of people could die!”

“Kagome!”

“I can’t stay here with all of you either. I don’t want to infect any of you. But Inuyasha said that he doesn’t usually catch viral illnesses from humans, so maybe he’ll be okay.” She coughed again, the slight wheeze in her breath evident even to Sango and Miroku now. “You can take me to Kaede’s. She has that isolation hut she uses when she’s treating sick patients.” She stuck her chin out, her expression serious, eyes glittering and feverish, but determined. “You can take me there Inuyasha. But not through the well.”

Inuyasha slung her backpack over his shoulders, then bent down to straighten his bulky suikan around her and pulled up the sleeping bag so only her head was poking out. 

“We’re gonna go, but this conversation ain’t over Kagome”, he said sternly, picking her up so that she lay in his arms, head supported on his shoulder. He turned to face Miroku, Sango and Kirara, and locked his gaze on Shippou, who was now openly weeping in Sango’s arms. “Don’t worry runt, I’ll take good care of her okay? By the time you get back to the village, she’ll be doing much better.”

“I’m gonna be fine Shippou, you’ll see”, coaxed Kagome, wanting to cuddle him goodbye, but now afraid to. She waved to Shippou, Kirara, Sango and Miroku, her hand just peeking out over the top of her sleeping bag cocoon, and then Inuyasha was off, his firm hold on her mitigating any jostling from the easy loping pace he was setting.

Her mind was whirling. She’d never even _thought_ about viruses. What if this illness she had was due to some virus that had previously been eradicated in modern times. She couldn’t go back through the well until she’d recovered. She wouldn’t risk it. But then, she was always moving backwards and forwards. What if she brought a virus back through the well from modern times that infected everyone and changed the timeline? What if she already had? There had been that bird flu scare in China earlier in the year. She would be like those European missionaries bringing diseases that wiped out half the population of South America. She’d been so thoughtless and naïve, more worried about leaving physical traces behind rather than illnesses. As soon as she was well again, changes would have to be made.

“Kagome stop thinkin’ so much”, said Inuyasha. He could smell her anxiety and the way her heart rate was increasing. She burrowed her head into his shoulder.

“I can’t help it”, she whispered raspily, suppressing her urge to cough. “What if…”

“No, shut up. All you need to think about right now is gettin’ better”, he snarled, slowing his pace to a brisk walk. His arms squeezed her tighter. “For fucks sake Kagome, you do this all the time. The world doesn’t rest on your shoulders, alright? No one can carry that. Stop wastin’ your energy worryin’ about everyone else and worry about you for a change.”

Kagome rubbed her cheek against his suikan, unable to use her hands tucked away in the sleeping bag. “But I have you to worry about me.”

“Yeah, and what a fuckin’ thankless job that is”, he grumbled. “The number of times you’ve thrown yourself into danger because you don’t think things through wench!”

“Oh yeah?” She tried to push away from him tucked in the confines of the sleeping bag, but it was not use. She grit her teeth, even though that made her headache thump harder. She wouldn’t feel hurt. She wouldn’t. He probably didn’t mean it. But the phrase ‘thankless job’ cut into her like a knife. “Well, what about you! I’m always patching you up, always worrying about you! You get hurt all the time! And you never…” Her raised voice caused another bout of coughing, the wheezing tone as she dragged air into her lungs causing Inuyasha to stop.

“Deep breaths Kagome”, he muttered, shifting her positing so she was more upright in his arms, then tapping on her back, trying to help her cough up the mucus he could hear trapped in her lungs. “That’s it. Cough it up – you need to get rid of that stuff.”

Kagome’s coughing gradually eased to slow wheezing breaths. He drew her back from over his shoulder, supporting her so she could spit the gobs of yellow green phlegm from her mouth.

“I’m sorry”, she wheezed. “That’s so gross.”

“Gotta cough it up Kagome, otherwise it’ll just make you sicker.”

Kagome shivered inside the confines of the sleeping bag. Her whole body was sore, but the dragging ache between her shoulder blades was the worst. She couldn’t ever remember feeling so ill. “How do you know this?”

“Spent a lotta time in my Mama’s sick room. At first they used to chase me out, sayin’ me bein’ there was invitin’ bad luck, but after a while the healer just ignored that I was there. She would tap on Mama’s back to try and help her cough up the fluid before she put the liniment on her back.” He snorted. “Didn’t help her none though. Half the castle died, her included.”

“Inu…”

“Don’t worry about it”, he said, glancing away from her, trying not to see the horrified pity in Kagome’s face. “I was never wanted there. It was only my Mama being there that made me stay. And she held on as long as she could. She was nearly as old as Kaede when she died. I left straight after her funeral and never looked back. They couldn’t wait for me to leave – some of them even said that having a hanyou inside the castle walls was what caused the sickness, a judgement brought down by the kami for harbouring a freak of nature. Feh.”

“But you… you would have still been so small”, Kagome whispered.

“So?” he bristled. “Yeah, I was younger than Shippou, but I wasn’t a runt like him. I survived! It weren’t easy, but I did it. Mainly to spite those fuckers that hoped I’d die during my first winter out of the castle. They’d all be dead now, every last one of ‘em. And I’m still here!”

Kagome managed to wriggle a shaking hand out of the sleeping bag and reach up to touch Inuyasha’s neck. She’d wanted to aim for his cheek, but she couldn’t get her arm free enough. “I’m glad you’re still here”, she whispered. “And I’m glad I’m by your side, even if looking after me _is_ a thankless job.”

His head dropped so that his cheek brushed against her fingers, and eagerly she stroked what she could reach. He sighed.

“I didn’t mean that.”

Her smile lit up her face, even under the flush of fever. “I know.”

“Close your eyes and go ta sleep wench. I’ll wake ya when we stop for the night okay?”

Kagome nodded, pulling her arm back into the warmth of the sleeping bag, snuggling in as Inuyasha pulled her tightly to his chest and began to pick up the pace again, rocking her to sleep with his easy ground-eating stride.


	2. Stormy weather

She awoke with a start, her breathing heavy and laboured. A nightmare of cruel eyes and a voice in the darkness that mocked as she was being burned alive still lingered, but when she opened her eyes she was alone, and the laughter was gone. There was still a crackling snap of flames, but it was accompanied by rolling thunder and the sound of trickling water nearby.

She blinked in the firelight, the dancing shadows making her vision spin even though her body was still, her cheek resting on something soft. Water spilled down the dark rock wall in tiny rivulets, its downward course highlighted by the crackling fire. There was a yellow backpack nearby, and something was still restricting her movements, just like in her nightmare.

She fought one arm free from the soft fabric of the sleeping bag, swiping clumsily at her sweaty face. She had too much hair, it felt heavy on her neck, damp with perspiration. Why was she in a cave? She tried to remember, but any coherent thoughts besides heat and thirst refused to come, like she was dragging to them to the surface through endless treacle, and she abandoned the struggle as too much effort. Looking out into the dark night, there was nothing to see but rain. A lightning flash illuminated the surrounding forest, the glistening leaves bending under the weight of heavy rain drops. Her throat burned with thirst.

Pulling her other arm free with an effort, she sat up, trying to ignore the worsening dizziness and thumping headache that accompanied her change of position. The sleeping bag felt restrictive and hot and vague memories of being trapped in her dreams seized her, making her panic. She had to get out. She struggled out of the sleeping bag, hands pushing clumsily at the shiny polyester, each movement costing precious energy, but felt relief once her legs were free. So tired.

Her hair was still sticking to her face, and she felt clammy and sweaty, so she shrugged off the weight of the thick red jacket wrapped snugly around her, her fingers fumbling with the knotted belt. Too hot. Too heavy. Even her shirt felt like too much. She tugged at the light cotton fabric, trying to pull it away from her body. And she was so thirsty. There was a water bottle near by, but when finally managed to twist it open and tip it towards her mouth only a few meager drops spilled out onto her tongue. She looked longingly at the rain outside the cave, wondering if it was cooler out there.

Staggering to her feet, she took a tottering step forwards, then lurched towards the cave wall to stop herself falling face first into the flames. Flinging her hands out to stop her fall, she landed against a large boulder, her knees scraping against the sharp edge. The horizon tilted, and she rested her forehead against the cool dark stone for a moment, heart beating fast after the shock of her almost fall. A sudden urge to cough overtook her body, and she lay against the boulder, her shoulders shaking with the effort, the dragging ache between her shoulder blades almost unbearable.

Turning her head when the coughing fit finally eased, she watched the rain falling, listening to the calming noise as she took deep rasping breaths. The world was going topsyturvy, the cave entrance seemed to be moving away from her, but she was determined. Staggering upwards, she leaned her shoulder against the cave wall, using it like a crutch to stop her downward descent. So hot and thirsty. The rain would make it better.

Finally she made it through the opening, her bare feet slipping on the damp moss covered rocks. Taking a few tottering steps out into the storm, she stood shakily, an inner voice warning her not to move too far away from the light of the fire, and raised her face up into the rain falling from the sky. Cooling water soaked into her clothes and her hair, and she opened her mouth to catch the raindrops, drinking them in eagerly. Shaking legs refused to carry her weight any longer, so she sat down with a sudden thump, uncaring of the sharp sticks and rocks underneath her bare legs. She closed her eyes and turned her face up to the rain again. It felt so much better out here than in that hot sticky cave.

She was so focused on the sensation of the rain running down her heated cheeks, she didn’t even hear the low growling noise as it approached, not until the growl suddenly turned into words.

“What the fuck do ya think ya doin’ Kagome?!”

Inuyasha stared down at the girl, who he’d left sleeping, safe and dry in a cave he’d found to protect her from the storm while he went out to hunt for something for her to eat. Now she was sitting in a mud puddle, her hair and clothing soaked, the faint scent of her blood being washed away by torrential rain. Kagome opened her eyes, which rounded in surprise as if she hadn’t heard his approach at all.

Inuyasha tossed the dead rabbit into the mouth of the cave to be dealt with later, then picked Kagome up, carrying her limp unresisting form carefully down the slippery rock surface. He plonked her down at a safe distance away from the heat of the fire, then moved back towards the front of the cave so that he could pull off his own soaked undershirt and shake himself mostly dry. His hakama, made of the same fire rat fur as his suikan, would dry quickly on their own, the water beading on the tanned surface and dripping off onto the cave floor. He turned to survey his wench again, a grumbling growl slipping past his teeth. What on earth did she think she’d been doing?

She was sitting exactly where he’d left her, her head nodding like she was almost asleep where she sat. The once untamed waves of her dark hair were lank, water dripping down from her head to continue saturating her thin cotton shirt, which was already sticking to her pale skin. The usually leaf green skirt was dark and heavy with mud and rain water, and there were bloody scrapes on her legs where she’d grazed them on rocks and twigs.

Dammit. He took deep breaths, trying to calm the sudden surge of fear that had risen up to choke him when he’d returned to see her sitting in the rain with the scent of her blood in the air. He shouldn’t have left her, even for the short amount of time it had taken him to catch the rabbit to roast over the fire.

Keeping one eye on Kagome, in case she had any more crazy ideas about going back out into the rain, he rummaged through her backpack to find the towel she used to dry herself when she bathed. Finding both it and her hairbrush, he dropped the cloth over her head unceremoniously, ignoring the unhappy noise she made.

“Yeah, well, shoulda thought a that before you decided to go sit in a puddle while you’re sick”, he muttered, rubbing the towel over her head, squeezing to try and get most of the moisture out of her thick hair. She was worrying him, even more than she usually did. On a normal day if he did something like this she would be fighting back, threatening him with sit commands galore, but she was just slumped there in the same position that he’d placed her, her eyes looking slightly unfocused. He pulled the towel off her head and examined her glazed expression anxiously. “Why on earth were you sitting in the rain wench?!”

“Hot”, she managed to croak out. “Too hot.” Then she coughed, the fit seeming to last forever before she could take a wheezing breath inwards.

Inuyasha’s hand moved from where it had been rubbing her back then moved to her forehead.

“Tch. You’re burnin’ up.” He brought over the medical kit and placed it in front of her. “What medicine were you takin’ for the fever Kagome? You need to take some more.” Kagome blinked at him blearily, as if she didn’t understand the question. He opened the pack to find the little packages of pills. There were two, both of them opened. “Kagome which one?”

Kagome coughed again, the attack wracking her small frame. He supported her as she coughed, then cupped her face in his hands. “Listen Kagome, this is important. What medicine were you taking?” Kagome’s head pulled backwards, trying to escape his grip.

“No, don’t”, she moaned. “Too hot.” A thin sheen of sweat coated her face now that he’d dried away the rainwater, and she tugged listlessly at her shirt, as if looking for a way to pull it off her body.

Sighing in frustration at the situation, Inuyasha picked up both boxes. They were still at least another days journey away from the village, as he’d had to stop and find shelter when the storm began, even though he’d planned to keep going until late into the night. He needed to get her back to Kaede’s – she would have the right herbs to help with her fever, but until then he would have to do the best he could.

He glared at the little boxes, as if staring at them would make them submit to him and give up their information. He only recognised some of the kanji on the shiny paper boxes, the rest were totally illegible to him. Cautiously, he held each paper box under his nose and sniffed - one smelt extremely bitter, with a slight trace of vinegar, and the other smelt vaguely plant like. But on the bitter one, the overlaying scent of Kagome was a little stronger, meaning she had handled it more recently. He opened up the package, noting that there were only four of the little white pills left. Damn.

He racked his brain, trying to remember if Kagome took one or two of the pills. He was pretty sure it was two. But was he sure enough?

Kagome tried to lurch to her feet again, and he dropped the box to catch her gently by the shoulders.

“Oi, where do ya think you’re goin?”

“I’m thirsty”, she whispered. He leaned over to her backpack to grab her water bottle, keeping one hand on her in case she decided to get up again, and then realised it was empty. He took the water bottle and held it out under a rivulet of water running down the cave wall close by – the rock was sandstone, so the water should be filtered and clean.

“Kagome, here’s some water. But I need you to swallow these as well. They’re medicine.”

She raised an arm as if to make an eager grab for the water bottle, but then dropped it listlessly. “So tired.”

“You can sleep again as soon as you’ve taken your medicine. Open up Kagome.” He popped one of the little pills out of the shiny package as he’d seen Kagome do, and pushed it into her open mouth, then tipped the water bottle until she swallowed. “That’s it. Good girl. Just need to take one more.” When she’d swallowed another tablet and the last of the water, he stroked her damp hair, trying to get most of it away from her face.

“Kagome, ya can’t go wandering off when I’m not here, okay? You’re too sick. Somethin’ bad coulda happened when I wasn’t here to protect you. ”

“Huh?” She blinked slowly.

He sighed. “What am I gonna do with you wench? C’mon, I’m gonna put you back in bed while I cook us somethin’ to eat.”

He picked Kagome up, and carried her back over to her sleeping bag. Her clothes were still dripping wet. Damn, he’d have to take them off her. Shit.

“Kagome. We need to get you out of these wet things alright? I know you’re not feelin’ well, so I’m gonna have to help. I’ll do my best not to look at… well, you know…” He went back over to grab the damp towel, trying to work out the best way to do this while preserving Kagome’s modesty, then grabbed a soft shirt from her backpack, one he’d seen her wear for sleeping. “Alright Kagome, arms up.” She blinked at him, then coughed, doubling over while he tapped on her back.

“Fuck it, let’s just do this fast.” He tugged the shirt up off over her head, keeping his eyes averted and then shuffled around behind her. This was not what he’d invisaged the few times he’d longingly daydreamed about taking off her underclothes, but there was no room in his brain for lustful thoughts right now. He was too worried. Her skin was pale and clammy, hot to touch. The fever seemed to have escalated quickly, and she didn’t seem to be too aware of what was going on around her. It took a few fumbles before he could get the fasteners undone on the underclothes that covered her top half, but he managed, only bending the little metal clasps slightly. He pushed the t-shirt over her head, trying to be gentle, then managed to feed her unresponsive arms through the holes. Now for the bottom half.

Taking a deep breath, he unzipped the back fastening on her skirt, and was relieved to discover that the skimpy underclothes that covered her lower half weren’t as wet. He decided they could stay on. Lifting her up, he let the damp skirt fall to the cave floor, then dried her legs with the damp towel, scowling at the scrapes and scratches marring the pale flesh on the backs of her thighs and her knees. They weren’t too bad, and had already stopped bleeding. He would deal with them in the morning, before they set off to the village.

“C’mon Kagome, back into bed.”

“Nooo.” She pushed at him listlessly. “I’m hot.” She blinked up at him, her eyes focusing on his face for the first time. “Inuyasha?”

He sighed in relief that she’d finally shown some sort of recognition as to what was going on around her. Worrying about this small slip of a girl was going to be the end of him. Gently tucking a wayward lock of damp hair behind her ear, he smiled softly at her.

“Keh, yeah, it’s me. Who else would be looking after your clumsy ass Kagome? Look at you - I can’t leave you alone for ten mintues without you scraping yourself up.”

“I’m sorry”, she sighed, her head nodding forward, as if it were too heavy for her to keep it upright. She rested her forehead against his bare chest as he pulled the weight of her damp hair off her neck, twisting it up into a sloppy bun and securing it with a stretchy band he’d found wrapped around the handle of her hairbrush. It didn’t quite look the way it did when she did it herself, but it would do.

“N’yasha, I don’t feel… so good” she coughed.

He stroked her back. “You’ve got a pretty high fever, so I’m not surprised. You took some medicine, so now you need to lay down and get some sleep and let it work.” Her hands wrapped around his back and she shook her head, the damp hair on her forehead rubbing against his chest.

“Wanna stay with you.”

His own arms wrapped around her, his heart thumping at her request to stay close to him. Every time she said she needed him by her side made a longing rise up in his chest, one that he couldn’t explain in words. He’d almost forgotten his initial reasons for pushing her away. Maybe it would be okay to let her sit up for a while until the medicine took effect and her fever cooled.

He stroked his hand up and down her back soothingly, ears focusing on her rattling intakes of breath now that she was mostly dry. He didn’t think it was much worse, but it definitely wasn’t better. They needed to get back to the village.

“You wanna sit by the fire then? I need to put the rabbit I caught on to roast.” He looked up towards the mouth of the cave, just in time to see a small fox wrap his jaws delicately around one of the dead rabbit’s back legs and begin dragging it slowly backwards. “Hey asshole, that’s mine! Go get your own!” Grabbing a small rock, he threw it to land right near the fox, smirking in satisfaction when it backed off with a small yelp. “Damn foxes. Even with Shippou left behind I gotta deal with their sneaky shit.”

Gently unwrapping her arms from around his torso and making sure she was sitting safely upright, Inuyasha moved over to the mouth of the cave, using his claws to skin and gut the carcass quickly then threw the skin, head and entrails out into the darkness, figuring that would keep the fox satisfied and away from any other food in the cave. He pushed the meat onto a stick and set it above the flames to cook, then stretched out both his damp kosode and Kagome’s wet clothes on some dry rocks near the fire. Hopefully they would be dry by morning. He sat back down next to Kagome.

“You feelin’ any better?”

She managed a small smile for him, no where near her usual cheesy grin, but a smile, nonetheless. He’d take it.

“I don’t feel so feverish now. But I don’t know if I really want to eat anything.”

“Just try a small bite, you haven’t eaten anythin’ all day. It’s a shame we left the tea kettle behind with the others, or I’d make you some tea too.” She rested her head against his arm, and he reached out to grab his suikan, draping it around her shoulders again.

“Inuyasha? Why aren’t I wearing a skirt?”

“Because you went outside and sat in a puddle wench, when I was off catching dinner.”

She blinked at him blearily. “I did?”

“You don’t remember that?” He waited for her anger, her revulsion at his removal of her clothing without her consent when she was ill and vulnerable, but she merely shrugged, shaking her head, then slumped against him, yawning.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I can stay awake for the food.”

Inyasha touched his hand to the back of her neck. She was still warm to the touch, but her fever seemed to have receded a little. Sleep was probably what she needed more right now.

“Then go to sleep Kagome. I can always find you somethin’ else later.”

He reached out to snag her sleeping bag, then stretched his legs out, so she could lay down with her head in his lap, a sudden memory pulling at him of when she had done the same for him. She gazed up at him, a thoughtful look on her pale face.

“Why do you take such good care of me?”

“Can’t help it.”

“Am I that pathetic?”

He snorted. “No. I just… I feel good when I take care of you.” His eyes flicked away from her steady gaze, and she settled down with her head in his lap. After a few moments, he stopped trying to resist the urge to run his clawed fingers through her damp fringe, doing his best to ease out the tangles that he’d created when he’d dried her hair with the towel. Maybe he had been a little rough. 

“Tha’s nice”, she murmured sleepily, and he felt that strange tugging sensation in his heart again. “G’night N’yasha.”

“Goodnight Kagome.” He eased them both back a little so he could lean against a convenient boulder, then looked down at the girl fast asleep in his lap, the darkness of her hair and her pale face such a contrast to the deep red of his hakama. So trusting. Had anyone else ever trusted him with their life the way that Kagome did? He didn’t think so. No one else saw him like Kagome did. She was special. A precious light in a world that all too often held darkness and pain.

His previous fears somewhat allayed now that her fever had settled and she was warm and dry, he couldn’t help the contented grumble that emanated from his chest. It was a sound that he didn’t make very often, it only came unbidden when he was calm and content around her. He wasn’t exactly sure what it meant, but that wasn’t important. It felt good to make it, in the same way that feeding her, protecting her, keeping her safe felt.

He was so focused on the precious girl in his lap, listening to her breaths and the way her heartbeat slowed and steadied as he continued the rumbling vibration through his chest, that he didn’t notice the fox creeping into the cave, not until it had successfully grabbed the stick and absconded with his half cooked dinner.


	3. A Mother's Love

Kaede sighed, rolling her neck from side to side to ease the strained muscles. She rose slowly from her cramped position at the low table where she’d knelt all afternoon, pounding fresh herbs for a poultice. Even though she used a cushion now as a concession to her arthitic knees, her joints were protesting painfully. Overuse, or was another Spring storm brewing, like the one last night? The fingers on her right hand spasmed a little as she shook them out, and she rubbed her aching knuckles absentmindedly. All these little aches and pains. When did she get so old? And why did these troubled times have to come upon her village? Yes, she was still powerful spiritually, but her aging body now came with all these niggling physical limitations that prevented her from seeking direct confrontation. The battle against Naraku and the collection of the Shikon no tama was much better left in younger hands.

Shuffling her weary limbs over to the door frame, she pushed the woven screen aside to look out down the road leading north, away from the village. The sun was setting, throwing its firey colours on to the darkness of the gathering storm clouds in the west. It looked like her arthritic joints had forewarned that more rain was brewing after all. She wondered how her children were doing, and if they were safely out of the weather.

Kaede smiled wryly. Such a motley little group they were. Even though they were no relation, and Inuyasha and probably Kirara were decades older than herself, she did think of them as her children, the closest she would ever get to having a family. Even though she was well liked in the village, loved even, the position of miko was a lonely one, set a little apart from the daily lives of others. Having that rag tag bunch burst into her life had brought her troubles, yes, but also joy.

She’d known Inuyasha longer than any of them. When she was just a simple village girl and her much older sister Kikyou was priestess of the village and guardian of the Shikon no Tama, he’d been there, looking no different than he did now, over fifty years later. Around Kikyou he’d been reserved, almost hesitant in his manner, as if he were afraid to upset her and draw attention to his half youkai nature. But he hadn’t been that way with herself, meeting her teasing questions with his usual gruffness, willing for the most part to suffer her childish fascination with him.

She could admit to herself now, she’d had the smallest crush on him – the innocent feelings of a ten year old girl for an older man who was beautiful, strong and unattainable. He was a big brother figure when for so long there had only been her and Kikyou, whom she’d adored as one who could do no wrong. And then Kikyou had died, accusing Inuyasha of fatally injuring her as she sealed him to the Goshinbuko in retaliation.

Kaede had visited the tree often in the weeks following Kikyou’s death. Yelled at Inuyasha, screamed at him, asking him how he could have betrayed them, when he’d shown evidence of loving Kikyou, when she herself had looked up to him as a big brother and a protector. In the following months when she could steal moments from her new role at the shrine, she visited the Goshinboku to sit amongst its roots underneath his silent beauty to weep hot heavy tears over the way her life had turned out. She had never wished to be a Miko, but she was helpless under the weight of village expectations when they discovered she also possessed reiki after Kikyou’s death. 

Over the years, those feelings had settled. Her grief had dimmed and she had accepted her role as village protector and healer, enjoyed it even. When her emotions finally ceased to cloud her memory, she recalled how Onigumo’s prescence had made her feel, the crawling uneasiness that crept up her spine whenever she visited that cave in Kikyou’s place. But there had been no answers to her lingering questions. And now… now she had more answers than she knew what to do with. Inuyasha had awakened and returned to her life, and so had Kikyou in a warped and twisted form. Onigumo had become the half demon Naraku and Kikyou’s reincarnated soul was housed in a girl five hundered years from the future. Fate truly had a warped sense of humour it seemed.

She was still learning what to make of Kagome, her far distant descendant who fell through time. She seemed to be such a spirited girl, always willing to speak her mind, never afraid to raise her voice, which was not in itself a bad thing, considering the circumstances. She had a good heart, always willing to give others a chance and try and see a situation from another’s perspective. And Kaede could plainly see that girlish heart longed for Inuyasha.

Was fate playing a part in this too she pondered? Inuyasha’s feelings for Kagome were also strong; Kaede was sure he meant for them to be hidden, but it was easy to see the regard he had for the girl. He cared deeply for her, in his own way. But what could come from it? Could they really have a future together? Only time would tell.

The last ebbing light of the sunset fell away, and Kaede let the door screen fall, shivering a little as the cool night breeze blew in around her ankles. Time to light a lamp and set the rice to cook.

She had just finished washing the rice and put the pot on the embers when she heard the sound of pounding feet coming up the path to her home, too fast to be one of the villagers, accompanied by the snapping aura of youki. Rising as swiftly as she could, knees cracking with age, she reached for her bow. But before her fingers could grasp it, Inuyasha crashed through the doorway, his chest heaving and expression wild.

“By the Kami Inuyasha” she scolded, “are you trying to give this old woman a heart attack? What is going on?”

He knelt next to the fire, clutching a gasping dark haired figure wrapped snugly in Kagome’s sleeping bag, and turned his beseeching eyes to Kaede. She was taken aback by his frantic words.

“Please, help her. Don’t let her die.”

* * *

Kagome woke with a start. She was so cold. Her teeth chattered, and she couldn’t control the intense shivers that shook her body, displacing the blanket that had been tucked carefully around her. But her head felt hot, sweat beading on her forehead then running down her face to dampen her hair and collect in the hollow of her throat. How was it possible to feel like she was simultaneously freezing and on fire – surely that was a physical impossibility. She groaned, wanting to open her eyes, but feeling like even that was too much for her.

Everything hurt. Every breath while she lay on her back cut like shards of glass, the pain excruciating, but she had no strength to sit up. It felt like there was a tight mask held over her face that only let the barest trace of oxygen into her screaming lungs, no matter how much she wheezed to take in air. Her body fought to cough and breathe at the same time, without her having any say in the matter, and she whimpered, panic rising. She was drowning on dry land, with no way to swim to the surface.

Warm hands. There was pressure on her shoulders, a soothing rumble, and she turned blindly towards it, craving the heat and life in those hands and the comfort of that sound. Now that she was upright her breathing felt a little easier, the pain in her chest and back more bearable, now he was here. Those warm hands moved her gently to lean against him, her naked skin shivering against fur and cloth, a deep rumbling sound vibrating against her spine. Warmth encircled her, those hands tugging a blanket up to her chin, and she sighed in relief, tucking her face in against that small patch of smooth skin, resting her nose into the hollow of his throat. The fresh clean scent of cedar and cypress from the woods calmed her. She could barely breathe, but she knew that smell.

“Inuyasha”, she gasped softly, raising one hand to clench her fingers into his suikan, her relief in his prescence palpable. She wanted to open her eyes and smile for him, show him she was glad he was here, but her body betrayed her, harsh coughs racking her already shivering frame. 

Inuyasha looked down at the pale girl in his arms. The previous silence of the small hut was now filled to the brim with Kagome’s coughing, the raw sound grating up her throat, stealing the air from her lungs until she was gasping. She looked so fragile, curled up as she coughed into his shoulder, letting out a soft whimper at the end of each fresh burst. It was a pattern that had repeated over and over since they’d arrived here the night before. Just as she seemed to settle and was drifting into sleep, her breath would catch, and another fit would start.

His heart clenched at the sight of her pained face, tears falling from her sooty lashes and down her feverish cheeks. He held her close, tapping on her back and supporting her as he had for the past night and day in the isolation hut.

When they’d first arrived and he’d begged Kaede to save her, the old woman had insisted he leave them in the isolation hut so she could get Kagome comfortable and sponge her down to help her fever, citing propriety. He’d hovered outside, snarling and pacing, listening to a barely conscious Kagome weeping and gasping inconsolably as Kaede tried to calm her with quiet words. After a few minutes, he hadn’t been able to stand it any longer, and had rushed back into the hut, pulling her semi-naked form into his lap, rocking her as he held her tightly in his arms. Almost without thinking, he’d begun to make that grumbling noise that he made only for her, and Kagome had calmed almost instantly, his deep rumbling vibration soothing her almost to sleep.

With a wry smile, Kaede had conceded to the needs of her patient and had handed Kagome’s nursing over to Inuyasha, only bustling in and out of the small hut behind her own to bring medicinal tea, broth, and water to sponge down her fevered skin. He’d lost count of the number of times he’d tapped on Kagome’s back to help her try to clear her lungs, sponged her heated skin with cool water in an effort to bring down her fever, coaxed the bitter herbal medicines down her protesting throat.

Inuyasha laced his fingers into Kagome’s, and she squeezed his hand hard as another coughing fit had her lungs spasming, more tears running down her face as she cried out in pain, finally managing to cough up the greenish phlegm that had been choking her into a cloth he had ready under her mouth.

“That’s it. Good girl. That’s my good girl. I got you.”

He hadn’t wanted to leave her side when she had finally fallen asleep after coaxing her to swallow a little broth to take away the bitterness of her afternoon dose of medicinal tea, but he’d had to. She wasn’t getting any better. There was no improvement, despite his and Kaede’s careful care. And he could tell Kaede was worried, no matter how calm she looked on the outside, which made him even more so.

So, heartsick and anxious, he’d gone through the well. He’d falteringly explained the situation to Mama Higurashi, his voice breaking a little as he told her exactly how sick he and Kaede thought she was. When she’d angrily demanded why he hadn’t brought her home straight away, he’d tried to explain Kagome’s reasoning and her fear of spreading the illness. Told her he was now making the decision to bring her back through the well against her wishes, and that he didn’t care if Kagome was angry with him. He’d just wanted to warn Mama first, in case she thought precautions needed to be taken.

After a few moments of pure panic, Mama had embraced him, soothed him with quiet words that he’d done the right thing in letting her know, and had taken charge of the situation just like he’d hoped she would. While he hovered in the background, she made a phone call to another mother to arrange a sleep over at a friend's house for Souta, then ran out to Grandpa sweeping the temple grounds to explain the situation. He’d wanted to stay, but she’d finally got him to agree to stay with one of his friends for the night, just until the doctor had seen Kagome.

Then she called their family doctor, asking if he could make a house call as soon as possible, explaining her concerns about possible influenza and not wanting to take Kagome to the emergency room at the hospital, just in case. As he left the shrine she’d just finished collecting medicine from the bathroom, and was busily putting clean sheets on Kagome's bed, the bedroom window wide open to and air out the room. All Inuyasha had to do was bring Kagome back through the well. He could feel the fear driving Mama’s nervous energy, but it also gave him hope. He didn’t care what else happened. All he cared about was Kagome.

Now that Kagome’s coughing fit had eased, he propped her limp form up against his chest, reaching for the pyjamas that Mama had given him to dress her in, fluffy, pink and soft. It was easy to tug the pants with the elastic waist up her legs and over her underwear, but the shirt with its tiny heart shaped white buttons tested his shaking fingers.

Kagome thanked him sleepily, her voice raw from coughing.

“Kagome, I gotta tell ya somethin’.”

She blinked her eyes open, looking blearily upwards and taking in his tired anxious expression with concern.

“Inuyasha, you okay?”

He snorted, sighing exasperatedly at her, and smoothed back her damp fringe.

“Stop wastin’ your breath on me, dummy, it’s you that we need to worry about at the moment.” He took a deep breath, his gaze serious. “Kagome, I want you to listen to me”, he said, his voice slow and deep. “I don’t want any fuss, and I’m not gonna take no for an answer. I’m takin’ you back through the well to your Mama.”

“No”, she whispered, reaching up to tug on his suikan weakly, her voice wheezing and cracking, “contagious… don’t want them to die… isolation hut, you promised.” Hot tears rolled down her cheeks, and her bottom lip trembled.

“I didn’t promise nothin’ of the sort”, replied Inuyasha gently, brushing away her tears with his thumb. “Besides, you’ve been here in the isolation hut for over a day Kagome, and you’re just gettin’ weaker. Kaede agrees with me. I ain’t gonna let you get any worse. I know you’re stubborn wench, but so am I.”

He folded down the collar of her pyjama shirt that was sitting crooked, and gently pulled the dark hair caught inside the collar loose to rest down her shoulders. Her tearful expression of betrayal was breaking his heart.

“I explained to your Mama what you were worried about, and she has it all sorted. Your grandfather and Souta are stayin’ somewhere else. She’s got a doctor comin’ to the shrine and medicine organised. It’s going to be okay. You’re gonna be fine”, he said, his voice hitching a little. He pressed his forehead to hers, then planted a brief kiss there as he tucked the dark sweat dampened hair hanging in her face behind her ears tenderly. “That’s what Mama said, and she’s never lied to me, so it’s gotta be true, right?”

His voice cracked a little more, and he took a deep breath, pulling her close to him, tucking her in under his chin to hide his sudden tears, blinking them away before Kagome could see them. He could swear over and over that he would protect her, that he would lay his life on the line for her, but what good was a sword against this?

“Inuyasha”, she whispered, her face burrowing into his chest, “… I’m scared.”

He pressed his lips to her hair, rocking her in his arms as he had the night before, when he was desperate for her to get some healing sleep. “Don’t cry my sweet girl, don’t cry. I got you.”

He eased himself to his feet with her still in his arms, moving slowly and carefully. He paused in the doorway where Kaede waited to say goodbye.

“Don’t cry child”, she said soothingly, patting Kagome’s arm in a comforting manner. “Inuyasha is doing the right thing – let him take care of you. Your body is working hard to fight this illness, but this fever of yours needs to come down, and you need rest. I am sure the healers in your time will know how to proceed, and I have no doubt I will see you again when you are feeling better.”

“Kaede…”, Kagome whimpered tearfully.

“None of that now”, said Kaede firmly. “Off you go. I’m sure your mother is anxious to see you.” She nodded to Inuyasha, her expression calm and kind. “Keep your spirits up Inuyasha”, she said softly, “all will be well, you will see.”

He blinked at the older woman, his own eyes bright, then nodded, his jaw clenched tightly as if to prevent the unspoken fears in his eyes from spilling down his cheeks. With Kagome held safely in his arms, he took off towards the well, his graceful speed pulling them from Kaede’s sight in no time at all.

Once they were safely away, the serene expression dropped from her face, and she raised her tired eye to the heavens, the late afternoon sun lengthening her shadow far behind her. In her long years as a healer, she had seen very few recover from the lung fever once their symptoms were as severe as Kagome’s, but surely the kami could not be so cruel. She was worried for Kagome, but just as worried for Inuyasha. How would he handle the loss if Kagome died, when he was only just beginning to accept the place she held in his heart?

“Please”, she pleaded, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek, “please let all be well.”

* * *

Mama was waiting for them at the well house, her usually kind brown eyes anxious above a white mask that covered her nose and mouth. Her breath hitched as she took in Kagome’s flushed cheeks and shallow breaths and she blinked away sudden tears.

“Mama, I’m sorry”, wheezed Kagome.

“Shh, baby, everything will be okay, you’ll see. I’m just glad to see you.” Seeing Inuyasha’s startled expression at the mask she was wearing she hastily explained.

“You said Kagome was concerned about infection, so I will wear this mask unless the doctor says she’s no longer contagious – that way she won’t have to worry. Please take her straight up to her bedroom so we can give her some medicine to help with her fever. The doctor will be here soon.”

She followed quickly behind Inuyasha as he carried her daughter up the stairs to her bedroom, watching silently as he gently placed her on the bed and propped her upright with soft pillows. She handed him two small tablets and watched as Inuyasha coaxed Kagome to take them, praising her when she managed to swallow them down with sips of water.

“Now that we’ve got Kagome settled, we need to disguise you a little before the doctor gets here”, she said quietly to Inuyasha, stroking his shoulder. “I’ve put some old clothes of my husband’s in the bathroom, a t-shirt and some loose comfortable pants – he was about your height, so hopefully they’ll fit well enough.” Nodding, he dropped a soft kiss to the top of Kagome’s head, then left the room.

“Inuyasha?” Kagome called out, her eyes widening at his sudden absence.

“Shh my darling, it’s okay. He’ll be right back after he’s changed into modern clothes. You want him to be able to stay in the room when the doctor is here, don’t you?” Mama soothed, sitting down on the edge of the bed. Reaching for the cloth sitting in a bowl of tepid water, she wrung it out, smoothing it over Kagome’s face and wrists, the heat of a mother’s love swelling in her chest. Her baby. No matter how old Kagome got, she would always be her baby.

Kagome began to cough and Inuyasha reappeared in the doorway as if summoned, pulling the dark t-shirt over his head as he sat on the other side of the bed, easing Kagome forward a little so he could tap gently on her back.

“That’s it. That’s my brave girl”, he soothed, as Mama reached for the box of tissues, placing them in front of Kagome. “Cough it up now, that’s the way.”

Mama couldn’t help the sudden tears that sprang up to roll silently down her cheeks, dampening the mask. When had the brash self-defensive boy that had burst into their kitchen over a year ago been replaced with this kind and caring man, his face worn with worry and fatigue? The weight of fear sat heavy on his shoulders, but his eyes when he looked at Kagome held an intensity of feeling that could not be denied.

She had been watching the growing attachment between her daughter and Inuyasha with trepidation at first, unsure how any relationship between them could work. They were both still so young! Where would they live? Inuyasha was half youkai - was it possible for them to have children? And what would happen when the first blush of love receded and Kagome began aging and Inuyasha did not – would he turn her aside? Questions, too many questions that had no answers, none that she felt she had a right to ask. There was no denying the love between them. And she felt with all of her heart that they were made for each other, and meant to be together. But she knew only too well, that love, no matter how strong, could be taken away, and she was petrified, for both of them.

She had grown to care for this boy like a son, this vagabond half demon from the past that had burst into their humdrum modern lives. Kagome had explained his lonely life previous to their quest for the jewel, and Mama had decided from that moment to love him fiercely, whether he wanted it or not. She could feel the neediness in him; it was hidden deep down, so deeply that he probably didn’t recognise it himself, but she could see it. She had welcomed him into her family, done her best to show him that she valued him both for himself and as a protector of her daughter, accepted him as he was. And now just look at him.

Kagome closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

“Inuyasha”, she said quietly, watching as he maneuvered himself to sit on the bed so Kagome could lean against him, “when was the last time you ate?”

His slow blink and blank stare had her nodding. Not recently then. “What about Kagome?”

“I managed to get her to take a little broth around midday. But not much. She said that eating makes her feel sick.”

“Alright, I’ll just make something for you then.”

“You don’t hafta. I’m alright.”

Smiling, she reached forward as she stood, softly tweaking one of his pointed twitching ears.

“I know I don’t. But I want to. You’re taking such good care of my daughter Inuyasha, let me take care of you.” Tactfully ignoring the sudden brightness in his amber eyes, she left the room to go down to the kitchen, turning to take one last look at them before she headed down the stairs.

Inuyasha had his head bent forward, his lips pressed firmly against the crown of Kagome’s head, his own long white hair falling either side of her face like a protective curtain. He was making a sound she could only compare to Buyo’s contented purring, deep and low. It was a calming sound, and even though she knew it wasn’t meant for her, Mama took comfort in it. Kagome was as safe as they could make her, until the doctor arrived. Yes, she was very ill, but she was also young and strong. Their little family would get through this, and come out the better for it, she was certain.


	4. Air

Now that Kagome was safe and asleep, Inuyasha relaxed enough to think about eating. It had actually been a couple of days since he’d eaten – that fox had stolen his dinner a couple of nights ago, and he’d been so worried looking after Kagome in Kaede’s hut, he hadn’t had the heart for it.

With appreciative growls, he scoffed down the plate of onigiri that Mama had quickly made him to eat as a snack before the doctor arrived, then heaved a thankful sigh. He hadn’t realised how hungry he was until he took that first bite. He could see Mama grinning in amusement at his fervent enjoyment of the simple rice balls, but he didn’t care. She took his empty plate and handed him the red bandana she’d put aside on Kagome’s desk, gesturing towards his pointed ears with a pointed look before heading back downstairs to the kitchen.

Inuyasha knotted the fabric over his hair with a sigh. He really didn’t like wearing one, even though he saw the necessity of it. He patted his hands over the top of his head, making sure it covered his ears, then sat down on the edge of the bed again, listening with rising concern to the sound of Kagome’s wheezing breaths.

The medicine Mama had provided had definitely brought down her fever a little, but it had done nothing for the rattle in her lungs. She was tossing restlessly on the bed in her sleep, and he reached out to take her hand, rubbing her cold fingers to try and bring warmth back into them. He’d teased her before about having hands like a cold fish, but they had never been like this. Even the tips of her fingers and her small oval fingernails had a cool bluish tinge.

She began coughing, opening her eyes, and he eased her into a sitting position, supporting her with one hand on her stomach and tapping on her back with the other as he had so often over the last few days. Kagome’s hands weakly grasped at a tissue from the box in her lap.

“Inu…” she gasped, as the harsh coughs shook her. Her breaths were growing shallower.

“It’s okay.” He rubbed her back soothingly. “I know it hurts, but you gotta try and cough it up.” Her eyes widened with panic as he eased her back on to the propped up pillows, and she clutched at his hand tightly. The blue at the tips of her fingers now also tinting her lips.

“Inu…”, she gasped, her chest heaving. “Can’t… breathe…”

“MAMA!” he hollered.

The wheeze in her lungs was louder, a definite whistle in her breathing, and he could hear her heart hammering in her chest, its pace racing like a panic stricken rabbit running for its life.

Inuyasha pulled her upright again and climbed behind her on the bed, pulling her back against his chest. The rumbling growl that had helped loosen the thick mucous clogging her lungs over the past few nights began without any thought on his part. He barely registered the sound of a plate breaking downstairs, and Mama’s panicked feet running up the steps, too focused on the girl leaning against him, the scent of her panic rising to envelop him like mist.

He entwined with fingers with Kagome’s, his thumbs rubbing against the soft skin of her smaller hands, desperate to help, but not knowing what he should do. He wanted to pull her into his arms and hold her tightly, but the small part of his brain still capable of conscious thought recognised that wouldn’t help her to breathe.

Mama took one look at her gasping daughter and ran back downstairs. Inuyasha could hear her slightly tremulous voice speaking on the phone in the kitchen.

“Hello? I need an ambulance please. To the Higurashi Shrine. Yes that’s 3-49-1 Minami Otsuka, Toshima-ku. Please hurry. It’s my daughter, she can’t breathe. We think it might be influenza. She had paracetamol half an hour ago. Please. Alright, I’ll listen for the sirens. Thank you.”

Then she was racing back up the stairs again, dropping with a thud to her knees next to the bed, her own hands covering Inuyasha’s and Kagome’s.

“The ambulance is coming my darling. Try and stay calm. Deep breaths, that’s it. Follow my lead.” She nodded encouragingly as Kagome struggled to slow her breathing, her brown eyes locked on her daughter’s face. “Inuyasha, I’m going to need you to carry her down the stairs so they can take her away to hospital as soon as they get here. I’m not sure if they’ll let us both ride with her, so-”

Mama glanced up as Inuyasha’s rumbling growl changed in pitch suddenly, dropping to a deeper tone.

“ ** _No one is taking her away!_** ”

Mama couldn’t help the slight shiver of fear that went down her spine. Inuyasha’s eyes, usually a beautiful amber, were changing – there was a flicker of red and blue around his iris, and pale irregular stripes like slash marks along his cheek bones. She didn’t really know what was going on, and Kagome was in no position to be able to tell her. But she understood that Inuyasha was frightened and angry. So she approached the situation in the only way she knew how.

“Inuyasha, I wouldn’t send her away from home, where I know she’s safe, unless I thought it was necessary.“ She tried to keep her tone warm and calming, the same as she would when Souta and Kagome were very upset. “You’ve taken such good care of her, and I am so very proud of you. But you brought her to me because you knew she needed help, because you knew she wasn’t getting any better.”

She smoothed her fingers over his, feeling the tension as the tendons in his fingers strained to keep from squeezing Kagome’s hands. “I’m her mother and I love her so much. You know that. You know that I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.” She smiled at him, pushing down her own upset, hoping that her words would reach him in his heightened state. “And you called me Mama just now, when you needed me. I hope that means you realise that I care for you like a son, and that I would never do anything to hurt you either.”

Inuyasha was panting, as if battling some inner foe, his eyes screwed up tightly. The slash marks on his cheekbones were fading in and out, pulsing like a heartbeat. Mama watched them both worriedly. Kagome was panicking even more as she listened to Inuyasha’s laboured breathing, unable to see his face behind her, but seemingly understanding what was going on with him. Small whimpers escaped as she struggled to breathe.

“Inu…” she gasped. “It’s… okay.”

“ _ **I can’t…**_ ” Inuyasha snarled. He dropped his head down so his head rested on Kagome’s shoulder, his nose pushed into the curve of her throat. “ _ **Can’t lose you**_.”

Inuyasha fought to push back his youkai instincts, which were screaming at him to take Kagome away so he could keep her safe. He tried to breathe in Kagome’s usually calming scent, but that wasn’t helping. She smelt of sickness and terror, and he couldn’t fix it. Couldn’t make it better. And he wasn’t sure if she was terrified because of her illness, or terrified of him losing control, which made him want to howl in despair. The last thing he wanted to do was for his youkai side to be let loose in the modern world. He tried to focus on Mama’s words, but even her usually calm tone had an edge of fear to it.

“Inuyasha, the hospital will help her. It’s a place with lots of doctors, who will all be doing their best to make Kagome better. They’ll help her breathe, and find out exactly what her sickness is so she gets the right medicine.”

All of a sudden a repetitive wailing sound rent the air, and he focused his attention on it. It was getting closer to the shrine, approaching rapidly. He’d never heard anything like it. He snarled, almost losing his battle with reason, hunching over Kagome protectively so he could be ready to either fight for her or beat a speedy retreat down the well. There was a rushing sound in his ears, and he could hardly hear Mama’s words. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to push back the waves of youki that wanted to gain dominance over his human side, ready to protect, ready to fight.

“Please Inuyasha”, Mama begged, “I know you can probably hear the sirens on the ambulance. That means it’s almost here. I need your help to get her down the stairs. I can’t fix this for her, not here. I’m not a doctor. Kagome needs to travel to hospital. They have machines in the ambulance that will help her breathe, I promise.”

He focused on that last sentence. Kagome needed to breathe. Nothing he could provide could help her with that. He had listened to his own mother drown on dry land, unable to breathe through the fluid and pus filling her lungs, and he never wanted to experience that horror again. To sit and watch someone whom he loved more than himself fight and lose against their own body.

“ _ **You promise?**_ ” he rumbled, his jaws clenched tightly. He let go of Kagome’s left hand and reached out blindly for the Tessaiga, which he’d propped up in its usual spot against the wall near Kagome’s bed. He squeezed the haft of the sword tightly in his fist, and felt a pulse against his palm, his father’s youki helping him gain control. His heart was still beating frantically, but he felt more himself. He opened his eyes and blinked at Mama, needing her answer if he was to let Kagome out of his arms. She squeezed his hands and did her best to smile reassuringly at him.

“I promise.” 

Taking a deep breath, Inuyasha lurched to his feet, carrying Kagome in his arms. He held her like a child, with her head resting on his shoulder and her chest close to his, one arm supporting her back, rubbing up and down, and the other cradling her legs. He wanted to keep her as close as possible for as long as possible. He didn’t know what would happen when they took her away. How long would she be gone? One night? A day or more? He wasn’t sure when it had happened, but he realised now that he needed her touch like he needed air. Without her, he would be alone in the dark again.

Before he could dwell anymore on it, he padded quickly down the stairs and out through the kitchen to the back door, pausing just outside as he waited for Mama to slide shoes on her feet and grab her handbag from a hook on the wall in the genkan. The wailing sound was screaming at him, and he looked at Mama again for guidance.

Reaching up, Mama rubbed one hand soothingly on his back, the other stroking Kagome’s forehead, murmuring words of encouragement to her daughter as she struggled to get in enough air. Together they walked carefully down the steep stone steps that marked the entrance to the Shrine, and waited underneath the red Torii gate.

“Inu…” Kagome wheezed.

He continued to rub his hand up and down her back, savouring her closeness. “Save your breath sweet girl. It will be alright. I trust your Mama and so should you.” He turned to look at Mama again, a question in his eyes.

“When the ambulance comes, there will be people who will help Kagome onto a bed in the back. They will probably put something over her mouth and nose that will help her breathe.” Mama’s voice faltered a little. “I don’t know if they will let both of us travel with her.”

Inuyasha took a deep breath. Now that he had calmed somewhat, he could scent exactly how worried and upset Mama was. She was putting on a brave face for both of them, trying to keep it together. Even though it would hurt to surrender Kagome to someone he didn’t know, it would be easier for him to follow than for Mama.

“You should go. You know what needs to happen in this time. They might ask questions that I don’t know the answers to, and I don’t want to say or do anything that would put Kagome in danger.” He looked at her sternly. “But I’m gonna follow.”

Mama gave him a watery smile, a tear running down her cheek, which she wiped away quickly. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

The both took a step back as the blaring lights and screaming siren of the ambulance rounded the corner. Inuyasha’s grip on Kagome tightened before he could stop himself. Mama rubbed his arm.

“They only turn on the sirens and lights to get here faster, so other cars move out of the way. I promise, it will be okay.”

As soon as the motor stopped, two men leaped out of the vehicle, one opening up the wide doors at the back of the ambulance, the other approaching them. Inuyasha tamped down the urge to growl.

“Higurashi-san?”

Mama stepped forward. “Yes, that’s me. My daughter Kagome has been ill with what we thought was just a bad cold over the last few days, but it’s suddenly worsened and she’s having trouble breathing.”

“Alright. Let us take it from here.” The man gave Kagome a kind smile, patting her shoulder. “Kagome-san, I can hear how hard it is for you to breathe right now. Let’s get you to hospital quickly so we can find out what’s causing this.”

Before the man could touch her again, Inuyasha stepped forward, jumping into the back of the ambulance where the other man was in the process of getting the bed organised. He startled in surprise, but shuffled back as far as he could in the cramped space so that Inuyasha could lay Kagome down on the thin mattress covered in a white sheet. His nose twitched with all the conflicting smells, and he clenched his teeth hard. He didn’t want to let her go, but he had to do this. Mama said it was the only way. He had to think of Kagome.

He laid her down on the bed and tried to step back, but she clutched at him, her eyes wide with fear, her breathing shallow and wheezing. He gently prized her fingers away, kissing them before pushing her hands back to her chest.

“I promise, I’ll follow. I’ll be right there.” Inuyasha took a step backwards as the man sat down next the bed, turning knobs and checking equipment efficiently. He placed a plastic mask over Kagome’s face, and something else on the end of her finger. The hiss of air almost covered the sound of her rasping breaths and her small whimpers of Inuyasha’s name.

Inuyasha fought the urge to rip the mask away, his fists clenched tightly. “Can Kagome’s mother travel with you?” he said, trying to smother the snarl that wanted to emerge. The man nodded reassuringly at Inuyasha as he reached for different items, placing them on Kagome’s skin. Inuyasha clenched his hands tighter.

“Yes, of course. We’ll take good care of them both.” Inuyasha nodded, then jumped down to help Mama climb into the back of the ambulance. As soon as she was settled on a small drop down seat, the other man slammed the door shut before Inuyasha could say goodbye. He’d never had a stronger urge to gut someone where they stood.

“We’re headed to Mizuno Memorial Hospital Emergency Room, if you’re following”, said the man with what Inuyasha assumed was meant to be a comforting smile. Inuyasha nodded as if that information made sense to him, then watched him climb into the front of the ambulance.

The motor turned over and Inuyasha stepped back on the curb, allowing Kagome to be taken away. He watched the ambulance turn the corner and he wanted to howl. But Mama had promised, and he trusted her almost as much as he trusted Kagome. He knew he couldn’t make Kagome better without help. But if she died…

He pushed the thought away as soon as it appeared. Kagome was young and strong, not older like his mother had been. She was a fighter, and almost as stubborn as he was. She would be okay, she had to be.

As soon as he was sure no one was watching, Inuyasha leapt onto the nearest building, and began leaping from rooftop to rooftop above the busy street, keeping the ambulance in sight. He had promised his girl that he would be right there, and he wasn’t about to let her down.


	5. Butterflies

Kagome did her best not to panic as the ambulance door slammed shut. She tried to listen to the slow deep voice of the paramedic explaining what he was doing, slightly muffled by the surgical mask he’d donned as soon as Inuyasha had laid her down on the bed and jumped down out of the ambulance. The paramedics hands were steady, his voice calm, and she tried to focus on watching him as he wrote down numbers on a chart and twisted dials on equipment .

Mama’s hand reached out to stroke her leg over the white sheet that had been pulled up to her waist, and Kagome closed her eyes, concentrating on the familiarity of Mama’s soothing voice and touch in the jarring interior of the brightly lit ambulance. But she felt adrift without _him_.

Strange as it may seem, she’d come to take comfort in the predictability of Inuyasha’s abrasive personality. It had taken her a while, but over the emotionally charged months that they’d spent together, eating, sleeping, laughing, fighting, she’d worked out that it was all a front. It was hardly surprising really, that he would build up emotional armour in response to his hard and lonely childhood. But he’d begun to gradually let that front slip as the trust between them built, at first offering grudging friendship, and now she hoped, something more.

Over these last few days as he’d cared for her, he’d allowed his true personality to shine through, and he’d become her lifeline, her one point of stablity in the pervasive fog of pain and fever. Inuyasha had promised he’d follow, and he never broke his promises. That was the only thing holding her together. Because she’d heard the second paramedic say the name of the place where they were going – the hospital where her father had died.

_She’d been seven – a happy little girl with no concept of how cruel life could be. Her father was late coming home from work, and all she’d been concerned about was whether he’d arrive home in time to read her a bed time story, because he did the voices better than Mama. But the familiar sound of his key turning in the lock never came. An unfamiliar knock on the front door at that time of night was jarring, breaking the usual evening family routine. It had surprised them all._

_When Mama opened the door, instead of her father’s smiling face there had been police, their faces sombre. They said there had been an accident. Mama was crying. Grandpa had stroked Mama’s arm while she stood behind them, unsure of what was going on. She tried her best to cling to Mama’s waist, but Mama’s stomach was now so full of her yet to be born baby brother that she couldn’t make her arms meet. The kind police lady had tried to take her hand, but she didn’t want a stranger, she wanted Mama and Papa. Mama never cried and Kagome was terrified._

_The police had driven them to the hospital, and she’d sat on the back seat, squashed in between Mama and Jiji, holding their hands tightly, the city lights going past in a blur. She hadn’t known what to think, what to say. There had to have been some kind of mistake that would be cleared up when they got there._

_They were told that they’d only be allowed in the ICU ward for a few minutes. The ward had felt alien, like another planet, the large open space filled with machines and curtains and beeps and whispers. Strangers with masks passed by them, with shoes that squeaked on the grey rubber flooring. The room stank of bleach, reminding her of when Mama had to clean up after Buyo’s little accidents when he was a kitten._

_Jiji had held her hand tightly as they walked past other patients, telling her softly that she must be careful not to touch anything, and that she had to be brave. She wanted to be brave, wanted Jiji to be proud, but she was scared, more scared than she’d ever been._

_And then they’d stopped at a bed at the end of the ward. She hadn’t wanted to believe that man in the bed was her father. He was completely unrecognisable, his chest and one arm covered in dressings and bandages, with more bandages wrapped around his head. He had tubes coming out of one arm, and a plastic mask with tubes coming out of it over his face. He wasn’t wearing the clothes he’d left the house in that morning, or the watch Mama had got him for his birthday._

_Mama’s shaking fingers had reached out to stroke the man’s unbandaged hand, so softly, like she was worried he would break more if she wasn’t careful. But that couldn’t be right. Her Papa was strong. Strong enough to throw her high into the air at the park. Strong enough to pick up Mama and whirl her around the kitchen until she giggled. Strong enough to help Jiji lift heavy things onto high shelves in the store room that she couldn’t even move._

_She’d told her mother quietly but clearly that the police had made a mistake, and they should go home. This was some other little girl’s Papa, and her Papa would be home any minute, wondering where his dinner was._

_Then her ears were filled with the frightening sound of her Mama’s anguished voice calling out Papa’s name. Nurses came running, drawn by the sudden beeps and alarms of the machines near the bed. Jiji had picked her up and taken her out of the way as she cried out for Mama, taken her back through the big room and down a narrow corridor._

_She’d sat with Jiji in a waiting room that smelt like sadness, with a tv that only showed one channel. There was a toybox, but the toys were all for babies. She flicked through a half filled colouring book that sat on a little table for something to do while they waited for Mama, but the crayons in the plastic tub next to it were all broken, with most of the pretty colours missing._

_It wasn’t Mama that came to get them, but a doctor. He’d asked them to follow him to a little room close by, refusing to answer Jiji’s questions until they’d gone inside and he’d shut the door. It was a small depressing space, with faded artwork hanging askew on the wall, empty apart from a few chairs and a table with a box of tissues on it. Mama was already there, crumpled in on herself like crushed paper, her face buried in her arms to muffle the sound of her crying._

_The doctor had said he was sorry, but there was nothing they could do – Papa’s injuries from the car accident had been too severe. The words had whooshed over her like an icy breeze. She didn’t want them to be true, and she’d frantically looked at Mama and Jiji’s faces in turn, wanting one of them to say that the doctor was wrong. How could those words be true, when he’d patted her on the head just this morning, and told her to do her best at school? Told her that he hoped she’d have a good day, and he’d see her tonight?_

_But Mama was still crying, her hands reaching out blindly for them both. Jiji had turned and collapsed onto the chair next to Mama, his own face ashen. Then he’d picked her up and rocked her on his lap, even though he usually said she was getting too big to be cuddled like a baby now that she was almost a big sister._

_Shocked tears had begun to pour down her cheeks, even as she felt Jiji’s tears dripping on to her neck, and Mama’s soft hands pulling her legs to rest on the small amount of lap she had left, stroking her softly as she tried to comfort her with broken words. And then she knew it_ was _true. Papa was gone. It had been an accident, but that accident had taken her Papa away as surely as if someone had killed him on purpose._

Now they were going back to that same hopsital ten years later, and she didn’t know how she felt about that. Part of her felt like that same petrified little girl, stepping into an unknown world. It was so hard to focus. Her mind was swimming, the constant fight for air was making her feel panicky, like she needed to run away. And her chest hurt so much lying down. She tugged on the paramedic’s arm weakly, trying to sit up.

“Is your pain worse when you’re laying on your back?” he asked, making adjustments to the bed when she nodded. “Sorry about that – I didn’t quite get the bed set up properly before your boyfriend carried you in. We’re nearly at the hospital Kagome-san. Deep breaths – let the oxygen mask help you.” Her brain tucked the word ‘boyfriend’ away to think about later, when she wasn’t struggling to breathe.

The ambulance pulled to a stop and the back doors opened. Someone helped Mama step down, and she was startled when the paramedic clicked a safety belt across her waist and her bed started to move, jolting her slightly as the legs extended to the ground and locked into place. Everything was a blur.

Large sliding doors swished open and she was wheeled into a small room, unable to see everything from her position on the bed. A nurse was taking her temperature, taking her blood pressure, talking to Mama and the paramedics, asking her questions, but she couldn’t answer, her breath wheezing behind the mask on her face.

The urge to run grew even greater, so much so that she half sat up and tried to swing her legs off the bed, but the belt still around her waist held her back. The nurse tried to restrain her arms gently, telling her to be calm, that she was safe. But she didn’t feel safe at all! She wanted to leave. A feeling of claustrophobia swept over her as she struggled to free her arms, her chest heaving as her body tried to breathe and cough at the same time. And then his voice cut through the static fogging her brain.

“Kagome. It’s gonna be okay sweet girl. Deep breaths, remember?”

People were arguing in the background, commenting on Inuyasha’s lack of mask and shoes, and Mama was saying something, trying to smooth things over, but none of that mattered to Kagome. He’d promised he’d be there and he was. Her hand shot out to grasp his fingers tightly, and she lay back weakly on the pillow, no longer struggling to run.

“Inuyasha…”

“Promised I’d be here didn’t I?” Kagome nodded, taking in gasps of air behind the mask, squeezing his fingers, her eyes locked on his. Inuyasha stroked his thumb over her wrist. “You gonna be good and take your medicine?”

“Please don’t leave again”, she wheezed, her eyes filling with sudden tears.

“Keh. Wasn’t plannin’ on it.” His other hand reached up to smooth her fringe back, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear, his face and voice a point of calm as the medical professionals bustled around her. “Just lay quietly, that’s my good girl. I’m here, and I’m not goin’ anywhere else.”

* * *

Inuyasha’s nose twitched behind the surgical mask they’d insisted he wear. Even though he disliked the feel of it against his face, it actually blocked out some of the scents that had irritated him so much when he first arrived, making him feel like he constantly needed to sneeze. Besides, they’d said if he wanted to stay in the hospital room at Kagome’s side it was essential, so he put up with it.

Mama had tied the strings on the mask on for him, over the top of his bandana, and had somehow found some hospital slippers for him to slip onto his feet, because apparently him being barefoot was also an issue. They were now both sitting beside Kagome’s bed, watching her as she slept.

His heart was full of gratitide. Thankful for Mama, who had made it clear to the healers that he was family and she wanted him to stay. Thankful that she had somehow found a way to explain things to him without making him feeling totally useless and stupid. Thankful for the medicine that was allowing Kagome to finally sleep, a proper sleep for the first time in days.

She’d been asleep for a few hours now. The nurse kept coming in and poking and prodding her, making him want to snarl at them to leave her be, but her eyes remained closed, her breathing still congested, but steady. Her face was still pale under the breathing mask, but it had finally lost that expression of constant pain and panic that had made him feel frantic over the last few days.

He really hadn’t paid much attention as Mama had spoken to the doctor after they’d got the results of all the tests. The phrase ‘viral pneumonia’ meant virtually nothing to him, but they’d said that Kagome was responding to the medication, and would probably start feeling better in a few days, seeing she was young and healthy, providing she took her medicine and allowed her body to rest and heal.

Before they’d given her the sleeping medicine, a nurse had come in to show Kagome how to cough effectively to help get rid of all the mucous in her lungs, and to show him and Mama how they could help her. Kagome had told the nurse proudly that Inuyasha had already been doing that for her, her eyes glowing as she gazed at him, and he’d felt his heart swell and his cheeks flush as all three women gazed at him approvingly.

He’d quelled his sudden urge to smash the window and leap out of it to avoid the sudden unwanted attention, but only just. He understood it would cause problems for Kagome and Mama and it wasn’t worth the momentary reprieve from the embarrassment. He was proud to think that what had come to him instinctually had actually been helpful, but that didn’t mean he wanted people _talking_ about it, and _looking_ at him.

“Inuyasha?” Mama’s voice was gentle and quiet, and had lost that sharp edge of panic that it had contained ever since he’d come through the well and told her that Kagome was ill, and he was glad.

“Mmm?” he replied, his eyes never leaving Kagome’s sleeping face.

“Now that Kagome is resting comfortably, I was thinking of getting something to eat from the cafeteria downstairs before it closes. Will you stay here with her for me? I could bring something back for you to eat if you like?”

“Course I’ll stay.” He thought for a moment. “Do ya think they’d have ramen? Or those po-ta-to crunchy things in the crinkly bag?” Mama stood, reaching for her handbag with one hand and stroking his shoulder affectionately with the other.

“I’ll see what I can do. I won’t be long. Don’t go roaming around the hospital while I’m gone, okay?”

“Feh. I'm not goin' anywhere. Why would I leave Kagome unprotected like that when she’s asleep?” He reached his hand out to stroke Kagome’s fingers resting on top of the blanket, so softly, like he was worried she would break if he wasn’t careful. Mama made a small sound behind him, and he turned his head curiously. The paper mask on his face seemed to be messing with his senses, because Mama’s scent seemed to be both sad and happy all at once.

“I’m so glad she has you Inuyasha” she said quietly, with a little hitch in her voice. And with that she turned quickly, moving out of the room and down the corridor.

“I’m glad I have you too.” Kagome’s voice was still raspy, but her eyes were clear, and he could see her smile beneath the plastic mask.

“Oi. You’re meant to be sleepin’. Quit talkin’ and close your eyes.”

“I’m awake now.” She tried to pull herself upwards, reaching for the strap that hung over the bed, but Inuyasha was too fast. In moments he’d helped her sit up, letting her lean forward against his strong arm while he tucked pillows behind her back like he’d seen the nurse do earlier.

“Thank you Inuyasha. Thank you for looking after me.” Her fingers stroked his hand, then twined their fingers together, her thumb caressing his wrist. She was looking at him with so much emotion in her eyes, he could hardly stand it.

Out of habit, all the usual words to push any contact away popped reflectively into his mind, but they stuck in his throat, and he swallowed them down. He didn’t need them anymore. Not with her. Not with Kagome. He tipped his head forward so their foreheads were resting against each other.

“I’ll always look after you my sweet girl, because you are precious to me”, he said softly, his fingers squeezing hers. But then he pulled back, grinning behind the paper mask, his eyes teasing. “That don’t mean you can slack off when you’re better though. You’ll have done more than enough layin’ around by then.”

Her sudden giggles turned into coughs, and it was second nature by now to help her, easing her mask off her face so she could cough up the phlegm. Even her cough sounded easier since she’d had that special medicine that went through the breathing mask.

He’d made the right decision, bringing her back through the well to her mother. If she’d stayed in his time, like she wanted to, he wasn’t sure she would have made it. His gut churned at the thought making him feel sick to his stomach, and he pushed the horrible images that came to mind away quickly, not wanting to waste his time on them. Kagome was right in front of him, and was going to recover. She was okay. Everything was going to be okay. He breathed out a sigh of relief, but she’d already noticed the fleeting change in his expression. She always noticed.

“Inuyasha?”

He stroked her cheek, taking the chance to feel the soft skin under his fingers before he had to put the medicine mask back on her face, and shook his head.

“Ain’t important.”

“Yes it is, if it makes you look like that! What’s wrong?”

He sighed, dropping his hand down to caress her fingers, unable to look at her face.

“You could’a died Kagome. If you were livin’ with me in my time with this sickness, with no way back through the well, you probably would have. And I wouldn’a been able to do a damn thing about it!”

He drew in a ragged breath, his heart beating fast, his youkai instincts rising at the thought of what he was about to say, snarling at him, but he pushed them back. This wasn’t about him. It was about Kagome’s safety, and he would always put her first. He stared at her hands as he gathered his courage to say what he wanted to say; they were so much smaller than his own. He couldn’t risk her.

“Kagome… when all of this is over, when we’ve found all the shards and beaten Naraku, I… I think it would be best for you if-“

“Don’t you dare!” she said, her eyes incredulous. “Don’t you dare say that I should stay apart from you! When I promised to stay by your side Inuyasha, did you think I didn’t mean forever? Did you think they were just pretty words?!”

He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “No, but… I nearly lost it when I thought you were gonna die Kagome, and I-.”

“News flash Inuyasha! People die in this time too! Look at my mother – her and Papa were so happy together, and _he_ died. Modern medicine couldn’t save him even though we loved him and needed him. Does that mean everyone should keep apart from the people they love? Should we both be unhappy just because something bad _might_ happen? Huh?!”

Inuyasha worriedly tried to soothe her with his hands, stroking her shoulders but she shrugged him off, her eyes snapping even as she took deep gulping breaths of air.

“No! It means the exact _opposite_! We should hold onto people we love _so tightly_ , because we never know when they might be taken away. We should cherish every moment! I love you Inuyasha! And if you think I will let you push me away-“

Another coughing fit stopped her tirade, and he rubbed her back, getting ready to place the mask back over her face. The machine next to the bed began to beep faster, irritating him. She pushed his hand away, and he growled.

“For fucks sake, just hold on, would ya? I know ya wanna yell at me, but you can’t do that if ya can’t breathe stupid!” he huffed, securing the mask back over her face. “Just concentrate on taking deep breaths. That’s it. That’s my good girl.” Kagome’s eyes filled with tears, and he brushed them away gently with his thumbs, but more kept coming, and he gazed at her with a heartbroken expression, blinking away tears of his own.

“I didn’t mean to make you sad Kagome. It’s just… watchin’ you be so sick – I’ve never been so scared. It made me realise that I couldn’t lose you. I just couldn’t. And I thought, if there was some way that I could prevent that sickness happenin’ again, even though it would hurt me so much to let you go, I just…” He gulped, unable to go any further, swallowing his own emotions as he brushed his thumbs on her cheeks.

She closed her eyes breathing deeply for a few moments. “Being apart from you would hurt me more than anything else”, she whispered, panting as she spoke. “Please don’t pull away from me now, not when we’re so much closer. Please.”

He whined at the heartbroken tone in her voice, desperate to fix it. Mama’s voice spoke softly behind them.

“Kagome is right you know. No one knows how much time we’ll be given with those we love. It’s very easy to take that time for granted.” She moved quietly into the room, sitting down on the chair next to Inuyasha. Her voice was serious, but not sad.

“But it sounds like you two won’t ever do that. And it also sounds like you still have time to be able to make decisions about what happens after your quest, however long it takes. But whatever happens, it’s important to make those decisions together.”

Inuyasha sighed and nodded, dropping his hands away from Kagome’s face to grasp her hands in his. He wished he didn’t have the stupid paper mask on so he could kiss her fingers.

“Alright”, he muttered gruffly, sniffing quietly. “One thing at a time, wench. Let’s just get you better first, huh?”

Kagome gave him a watery smile, almost hidden by the breathing mask. She squeezed his fingers tightly, as if to show him she wouldn’t be letting him go in a hurry.

“Alright.”

* * *

Inuyasha walked slowly and carefully along the thin dirt track, worn through the grass by years of villagers footsteps between the village and the Bone-Eaters Well. He leaned forward a little, not wanting to dislodge his sleeping cargo.

It had been just over a week since he’d carried Kagome back through the well in that desperate dash from Kaede’s isolation hut, and today was the first time he'd brought her back to his time. She’d only been out of hospital for two days, and even though her health was much improved, she still got out of breath easily and tired quickly.

She’d had a short visit to school this morning, just enough to see her teachers and pick up assignments for her subjects. Her mother had taken her, and he’d waited at the shrine at their insistence, sitting in the branches of Goshinboku and fretting about being apart from her.

All his senses were constantly attuned to her now – smelling her scent to make sure the illness wasn’t returning, listening to her heartbeat and breathing, needing to be close by so he could see that she was okay and reach out and touch her. He knew he was smothering her a little, but he couldn’t help it. Last night he’d sat outside the bathroom while she soaked in the tub, on alert just in case she dozed off in the water, and she’d almost tripped over him when she came out.

She’d understood his constant monitoring of her to some extent, but she was beginning to get a little exasperated at him. He was pretty sure if he kept it up, there’d be a solid string of ‘osuwari’ commands in his immediate future. But he couldn’t help it – she’d been so ill and still wasn’t quite recovered and probably wouldn’t be back to her full stamina for some weeks yet, and it brought out every protective instinct he had.

When Kagome and Mama had returned from school, Kagome had the bright idea of coming back to see the others, to show them she was okay. Her mother had agreed that a quick visit should be fine under Inuyasha’s watchful eye, even though he’d wanted to veto it, but he’d been helpless against Kagome’s pleading. It seemed he was turning into a spineless lap dog every time Kagome turned those persuasive blue eyes his way, and he wasn’t entirely upset about it.

Even though Inuyasha had been popping backwards and forwards through the well daily to keep everyone informed about Kagome’s progress, her arrival had provoked much excitement. Her friends had been delighted to see the physical proof that Kagome was on the mend.

Kirara and Shippou had burst out of Kaede’s hut the moment they sensed her drawing near, Kirara winding herself around Kagome’s ankles in greeting, and Shippou bouncing about more like frog than a fox. It was only Inuyasha’s warning growl that he would take Kagome home again if he couldn’t be calm around her that had settled the tiny kit down.

Kaede had welcomed them both into her home with warm smiles and the offer of tea. Sango had pounced on Kagome with a delighted hug, eager to talk and reconnect with her best friend, and Miroku was there with a grin and a brotherly pat on her shoulder, pleased to see her looking so much better.

They had visited with everyone at Kaede’s hut for an hour, Kagome chatting happily with everyone, but the moment she had yawned Inuyasha had been insistent on taking her home again.

Shippou had clung to her tearfully, but she’d assured him that Inuyasha would bring her back again tomorrow, and she’d stay longer. Her promise of a treat had probably helped dry his tears also, Inuyasha thought. He snorted. Shippou was nothing if not predictable.

A gradual increase in the speed of Kagome’s heartbeat had him looking over his shoulder as she stirred back to wakefullness, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder. He watched her yawn out of the corner of his eye, and smiled as she rested her chin on his shoulder, pressing her soft cheek against his.

“Oh look, how pretty!” she said quietly, mindful that her mouth was very close to his sensitive ears. “Do you think we can stop for a little while?” She pointed over to the grassy meadow near the well, which was currently filled with pink and purple cosmos flowers, swaying in the gentle breeze, and dozens of butterflies flitting about in the bright sunshine.

“I dunno”, he grumbled. “You’ve already been out all morning. This has been a busy day for you – ya only got outta bed for the first time the day before yesterday.”

“Please Inu? I promise I’ll be good! It’s so cloudy in Tokyo at the moment, and the weather report said it was going to rain this afternoon. It would be nice to sit in the sun for a little while, and I’m sure it would be good for me!” she wheedled in a pleading tone.

He sighed. “Okay, just for a bit then.” The phrase ‘whipped’ came to mind, but when she reached up to gently stroke his ear as a thank you, he found he didn’t care in the slightest.

Walking over to a particularly lush patch of grass, half in and half out of the sunshine, he eased her down off his back and they both sat down. Inuyasha sat up straight with his arms braced so Kagome could lean on him as a back rest.

It really was a beautiful day – birds chirping, clouds drifting far above in a sapphire blue sky. A pair of dark swallowtail butterflies fluttered directly overhead, and he tipped his head back to watch them, the iridescent colours in their wings flashing in the sunlight. A thought crossed his mind that he would never have really sat down to enjoy a grassy meadow like this before meeting Kagome. His mind would have been on where his next meal was coming from, his eyes, ears and nose vigilant to catch any traces of other youkai entering his forest. But now all his senses were trained on her.

He focused for a moment on the warm weight of her leaning against him, the regular movement of the muscles in her back as she breathed in and out. There was still a slight wheeziness to her breathing, but nothing like it had been before. The sun went behind a cloud and she shivered slightly.

“You’re not cold are ya? Cause I can take you back through the well right now if ya are”, he fussed.

“Stop it will you? Mother hen!” Kagome elbowed him hard in the ribs, and he grunted, clutching his side and pretending to be mortally wounded as he flopped down to lay on his back in the grass next to her. He squinted as the sun came back out from behind the clouds suddenly, and she shaded his eyes from the bright sunlight with her hand as she giggled. “Let me just enjoy the sunshine for a little while longer. I’m perfectly fine. It’s nice sitting outside after being in bed for nearly a week.”

She leaned over him to cast his face in shadow, her hands either side of his shoulders and a bright grin on her face. The light behind her gave her dark hair a radiant halo, picking out iridescent blue highlights much like the butterflies’ wings, and her clear blue eyes were more luminous than the skies above. He stared up at her, a rush of emotion welling up, filling his heart. She was so beautiful, inside and out. This girl. His sweet girl.

Reaching up he cupped her cheek, and she turned her head to place a soft kiss in his palm. Even though he’d hated that she’d been ill, they were so much closer now. All his barriers had fallen away – he was an open book to her now, and he wanted to be.

“Kagome… you know I’m not good with words, but-“. Her finger pressed down on his lips.

“Don’t use your words then” she whispered. “You’re much better at showing than talking Inuyasha, you always have been. Show me what you want to tell me.”

“C’mere then wench.” His clawed fingers curled around the red tie of her school uniform shirt, gently tugging her downwards to press his lips softly to hers.

She whimpered, her voice and her scent conveying to him just how much she wanted this too. It seemed like they had been dancing around their feelings forever, but there had never been the time or space to allow it to happen, with constant interruptions. But right now, nothing was going to stop him showing her the things he was never able to say, the emotions he’d tried to hide up until now, the absolute wealth of adoration that he held in his heart for her.

The first touch of their lips was intoxicating to him, and his mouth moved hungrily, savouring their connection. Her lips were soft and sweet, just like he’d always imagined them to be, and he couldn’t resist sucking gently on her bottom lip, fangs scraping slightly as he slid the tip of his tongue over the plump pink flesh. He almost pulled back in surprise when her own tongue tentatively met his. His youki rose as her scent spiked, and he eagerly deepened the kiss, growling his approval, unable to hold back any longer.

Kagome traced the contours of his face with her fingertips as they kissed, and he took her hand in his, entwining their fingers. He reveled in the weight of her over him, their racing hearts almost beating in tandem. With his fervent kisses he desperately tried to convey the depth of his feelings, and she responded in kind, her own lips eager as his.

Stroking her hair with his free hand, his claws grazing against her skin now and again, Inuyasha sighed against her lips, knowing that he would have to pull back soon, as much as they both wanted to keep this going. She was still recovering, and her breathing was becoming erratic. He would not rush this. They had time now, time to let this happen gradually, at their own pace.

He pulled back from the kiss, grinning at her little whine of discontent even as she panted for breath, and he soothed her by pressing soft kisses along her jawline, then nuzzled his nose into her neck, inhaling the heady scent of her as he struggled to get his own breathing and libido under control.

“You okay?” he whispered, using his hand to gently lay her head down on his chest, combing his fingers through her dark hair.

“Wow”, she panted.“Just gotta… catch my breath. We’re gonna do that again, right?”

He chuckled. “Definitely, if I have any say in it.”

They lay there together in the sunshine, holding each other close. Time didn’t seem to matter. Nothing mattered, apart from the feel of her lying safe against his chest, her heart beating strongly against his. He pressed his nose into her hair, breathing in her scent. The contented rumble in his chest made Kagome grin, turning her head to rest her chin against his chest.

“I love that sound”, she smiled, gazing into his eyes. “I love how it makes me feel, like nothing bad could ever happen when I’m in your arms.”

“Damn straight.” He swallowed, taking a deep breath. “Cause… cause you’re mine Kagome, and I protect what’s mine.”

Her smile widened, rivaling the sun in it’s brightness. “And you’re mine Inuyasha, and don’t you forget it.” She yawned widely, her eyes blinking, and he reached up to cradle her cheek.

“Sounds like you need a nap wench-o-mine.” She smiled sleepily.

“I am a little tired. What a good thing you’re so comfy”, she teased, poking at his stomach with her fingers and rubbing her cheek against his chest.

“Oi! What am I now, a futon?” he chuckled. She breathed deeply and closed her eyes, snuggling in to get comfortable.

“Shhh, futon’s don’t talk.”

“Are ya sure you don’t want me to take you back through the well?” he asked with concern. “It’s gettin’ later in the afternoon, and your bed’s probably better for ya right now.”

“Nope. Nothing could be better for me than being right here with you. Now shush.”

He listened as her breathing settled and her heartbeat slowed to a steady resting pace. The shade of the tree moved over them, and he wrapped his arms around her, the voluminous sleeves of his fire rat acting as a protective blanket as she slept contentedly in his arms.

He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve her; he’d never really understood what she could see in him that he’d never been able to see himself. All he knew was that he would thank the Kami every damn day that she’d somehow come into his life, against all odds, and he would freely give her his heart and soul. Would continue to protect her with his life as they fought this battle against Naraku together.

He was still worried about what might happen after the jewel was purified, but for now, he was content to let the future look after itself. Because how could his future be anything but bright, with Kagome by his side.


End file.
